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<title>Valley of the Geeks</title> 
<link>http://www.valleyofthegeeks.com/</link> 
<description>High Tech Humor Served Fresh Occasionally</description> 
<language>en-us</language> 
<copyright>Entire contents  Copyright 2002 M. Zack Urlocker.  All rights reserved. No kidding.</copyright>
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<description>High Tech Humor Served Fresh Occasionally</description> 
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<title>Shnob Appeal</title>
<link>http://www.valleyofthegeeks.com/Features/Shnob.html</link>
<description>
<![CDATA[
Charles Schwab &amp; Co has managed to keep their nose clean while other brokerages were hit with conflict of interest scandals.&nbsp; But now even Co-CEO Charles Schwab has quit his own firm.&nbsp; Chuck, as he's known, has long been the underdog of individual investors.&nbsp; These days, he might benefit from a fresh start, too.
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<title>VC Report</title>
<link>http://www.valleyofthegeeks.com/News/VCReport.html</link>
<description>
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According to the Q1 2002 Venture Report by The Money Toilet ("We're flush with cash!"), investment in Venture capital has increased significantly in Q1, despite fund returns coming in at approximately -85% ( -20 Celsius).
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<title>Way Too Many Banner Ads</title>
<link>http://www.valleyofthegeeks.com/Features/BannerAds5.html</link>
<description>
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Inspired by decades of Mad Magazine and Wacky Packages we keep publishing fake banner ads and, oddly enough, people keep asking for more. So we'll try to make this a regular monthly feature. Otherwise, we'll have to rename ourselves as Valley of the Banner Ads.
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<title>Big N' Ugly</title>
<link>http://www.valleyofthegeeks.com/Features/BigNUgly.html</link>
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Do you ever find yourself reading the nutritional information at a fast food restaurant?&nbsp; Sometimes it feels like it's not fast and not even food.&nbsp;If there's truth in advertising, maybe McDonald's next campaign would look something like this...
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<title>Oracle Teams with Mafia</title>
<link>http://www.valleyofthegeeks.com/News/OracleMafia.html</link>
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Oracle today announced a new strategic agreement with US organized crime syndicate the Zamboni family of New York. "In this tough economic climate, we wanted a partner that would do 'whatever it takes' to be successful," said CEO Larry "the mouth" Ellison. "Believe me, these guys will do that and more."
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<title>Lonely at the Middle</title>
<link>http://www.valleyofthegeeks.com/Features/LonelyAtTheMiddle.html</link>
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<![CDATA[
A lot of people wonder exactly what a product manager actually does. I have product managers who work for me and I'm still wondering.&nbsp; People question: What's it like to hobnob with marketing gurus and industry execs at high falutin' conferences? Frankly, I've puzzled over this myself.
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<title>Larger iPods</title>
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Apple Computer has announced its next generation of new more powerful iPod music players with larger storage.&nbsp; The new iPods store over 7,500 files and comfortably seat four adults.&nbsp;
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<title>Ballmer Leaves Microsoft</title>
<link>http://www.valleyofthegeeks.com/News/BallmerKiss.html</link>
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<![CDATA[
Microsoft today announced the resignation of CEO Steve Ballmer after just over two years in the top position. Ballmer will be be exiting the Microsoft executive suite to pursue a life-long dream of joining the rock group KISS. The announcement caused a flurry of activity on Wall Street this morning as investors unloaded Microsoft shares and bid up KISS paraphernalia on eBay.
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<title>Apple Supercomputer</title>
<link>http://www.valleyofthegeeks.com/News/Supercomputer.html</link>
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Students, faculty and custodial staff at the New Jersey Institute of Technology and Monster Trucks announced that they created a new supercomputer powered by thousands of Apple computers, each with 2% market share.
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<title>Schedule Slippage</title>
<link>http://www.valleyofthegeeks.com/Features/Slippage.html</link>
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Even the most conservative project schedules usually end up slipping. But if your management is like most, they're probably sick of hearing the same old excuses. So here's our new Top 10 Excuses you can use.
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